Tuesday, September 30, 2008

So Many Dynamos: 0, Missouri gas station rednecks: 1

Drove all night to Denver and now my tired ass is typing from a coffee shop around the corner from the house that The Photo Atlas lives in. It's apparently the only place in Denver that advertises for free wireless internet and actually has it. McDonalds, Burger King, and Starbucks in the neighborhood all lied to me.

Our shows in the Midwest recently were all much more home-y than we were expecting. Chicago was the best show of the tour (sorry Philadelphia) and possibly our best Chicago show in general. Iowa City was fun, the St. Louis show was a party, and Lawrence was actually painless unlike every other show we've ever played in Lawrence.

In the middle of Missouri yesterday, I woke up from an unsatisfying van nap and stumbled into a gas station. I bought a Laffy Taffy rope and a small package of Now and Laters, both of which were 25 cents. The guy behind the counter (stocky redneck with a bright gold cross necklace) tried to charge me over a dollar. I asked him how he got that number and showed him that it blatantly said 25 cents on the Laffy Taffy wrapper.

He looked dumbfounded and glanced at his fellow redneck employee behind the counter. "Can you believe this is only a quarter? How are we supposed to make any money anymore?" As I paid the man, he leaned to his friend and said "well, if Obama becomes president, we'll be selling everything for a quarter. We're all going to be his right hand man." I don't know what that sentence means, but it's retarded.

His friend replied "He's already Bush's right hand man!" I know what that sentence means, and it's completely retarded.

So I told the men behind the counter, "you guys are both retarded."

"Oh yeah?" they chuckled.

"Yeah," I replied. "Completely retarded."

Then I left and got into the van and realized that I left my Laffy Taffy rope on the counter. I guess they win this round.

We're going to be driving a lot in the next few days. I got the new Chuck Klosterman book and it's great. The Loud Wars is coming out in February.

more news to come.

7 comments:

Tobias said...

Shitting snot notwithstanding, I think this is one of my favorite blogs currently available. No lie.

Vicky said...

Way to go Ryan, even if they got your Laffy Taffy, you still won that one.

PS are you telling me that the ONE chicago show I miss also happened to be your best? Its hard to believe because they've all been fantastic.

PPS LOOOOOOUUUD WAAAAARS!! I really can't wait.

Kasper said...

Seriously? February? ... let me guess, you finally won Barsuk over?

Solar Bear will eat you. said...

That was by far one of the best shows we've played. You gotta come back through denver so we can play music together and talk about the kids' excessive use of the word "fuck" and its many variations.

Bisa said...

The Chicago show was amazing! Although I was very disappointed when I found out (2 minutes ago) that you guys aren't coming here with Ra Ra Riot. That would have been my 6th Dynamos show, too. Oh well...looks like I'm going to have to go to Decatur.

morespineinjellyfish said...

I have an image of these two men in my head, and they don't seen very pleasant.

You should've went back for the Laffy Taffy though !

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